Love The Home You Have

I can't remember the exact day or where I found this article, but somehow I stumbled across a blog that addressed just what the title of this post says: Love The Home You Have. I'm pretty sure there is a book that just came out talking about this subject, and just the title alone caught my eye. Being one who LOVES decorating my home, I started to wonder, do I really love the home I have? Well, I love that I have a home. And I love whom I share it with. And I love that I can mix & match my stuff to somehow create something worthy of a like or comment on social media over. But the more I thought about it, I started to realize that so much of what I do in my home is for others, not for myself and my husband. I don't mean necessarily that my house is made of glass, and all I want is for people to look in and ohh and aww over. I am not perfect, nor do I have the perfect marriage or perfect house. But even through all of my imperfections, I honestly believe that if something is on my heart that the Lord is helping me through, then maybe I can encourage someone else who may be in the same boat. You know, we will overcome by the blood of the Lamb, and the words of our testimony. Yes, when I see the word testimony, I think of when Jesus changed my life, but I also think about the lessons and daily reminders that He teaches me through all the little things I come across. Like being a home maker. So stick with me as I try to find the words to share from my heart, in hopes that I am not alone in this.

I once had some friends over for dinner, and we were in the dining room eating when someone mentioned a sign I had on my wall. It was a little white farmhouse style sign that said Fresh Eggs. I mentioned how I bought it at goodwill (yay for thrifting) and then words spilled out of my mouth..."I figured someone would think it was cute." Someone, meaning not me. I could have said "Oh, I just thought it was so cute!" But I didn't. Instead, I saw a tiny glimpse of something deep inside my heart that was leaking out. For the very first time, I caught myself doing something for my home for the approval of others. Mind you, I have come to know this about myself a long time ago with needing/wanting approval. I read Joyce Myers' book Approval Addiction back in college, and it was eye opening. But never had I thought about it in terms of how I decorated my house. I was embarrassed.

A year later, I was in a major purge of all of my house stuff. Thanks to Pinterest, I had read so many articles about being more minimalist, that I wanted to literally get rid of everything (ok, maybe not everything) and live in a fresh, clean, bare house. Reality set in pretty quick into my declutter frenzy, and I realized I liked so many different things in my home. Most of my stuff I will gladly tell you how I thrifted it for cheap. Some things I own were gifted to me. Very rarely do I outdo myself and buy expensive items just so my house looks good. But regardless of the price of an item in my house, I realized I was holding onto things that I didn't care for or love, all because I had this thought in the back of my mind, that someone else would probably like it, so I should keep it. Silly me! I ended up selling that little Fresh Eggs sign for a few bucks, and felt relieved that I could be free to get rid of things that weren't "me."

These past few weeks, I've had another idea run through my head. I kept seeing homes online that had that whole eclectic thing down. I am so not one to hoard stuff, and I can't stand the sight of clutter, but something I kept noticing in the houses that have so much style, patterns, colors, etc. was that it was all stuff they LOVED. And as much as I want to have a minimalist house that is always clean and catches the attention of anyone and everyone who sees it, if it isn't filled with things I love, then what's the point. So here I am struggling between wanting to be more minimalist, and wanting to display every. single. photo. I own because I love the people in them, I found what I really wanted.
What I really want, more than likes & comments on social media, more than a picture perfect home, is a place for my husband and I to retreat to. A place where friends can come over & make themselves at home. A place where it's ok to be silly, sad, joyful, and where the Holy Spirit can dwell. I want my home to be all that it can be, right now. I don't need the high dollar decor. I don't need to perfect color of paint on the walls. I don't need this or that. I already have. I have a place to rest my head. I have running water, A/C, electricity. I have photos displayed throughout the house because they make me happy. I have a bright colored kitchen w/ M's over the cabinets. I have much to be thankful for.

In saying all of that, I hope you are encouraged. As lovely as every house is on HGTV, Pinterest, and in the Magazines, what makes a house a home is more that just paint & decor. It's the love you put in it. It's the memories made. It's laughing around the dinner table with friends. It's crying on the couch at a sad movie (I'm a sap!). It's sitting on your porch (as big or as small as it may be) to enjoy the air outside. Your home is so much more that the material items inside. My prayer is that now that my eyes have been opened to just how much approval I wanted from others on how cute my home is, that I will shift my focus onto the things that matter, like creating an environment of love, peace, patience, kindness, etc. inside of my walls where I call home. Regardless if your married, single, with children or not, the environment you set in your home & the memories made there will be what is remembered, not if you had the cutest mantel or perfect shabby chic living room.

Let's stop waiting to have everything on our wishlist for the perfect home, and start loving the home you have, imperfections & all! Some days may be easier that others, but we are in this together!

Becky